INTRODUCTION: THE POISON HIDDEN UNDER THE NAME OF LOVE
Toxic relationships are connections that appear loving on the surface, but gradually damage a person’s soul, identity, and self-confidence.
In these relationships, love is not based on tenderness but on control and manipulation.
The most dangerous part is that over time, a person begins to normalize this toxicity.
In this article, we will deeply explore the nature of toxic relationships, their causes, their impact on self-esteem, and ways to break free.
1. WHAT IS A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP?
A toxic relationship is an emotional bond in which one partner continuously exerts moral pressure, manipulation, criticism, competition, or control over the other.
Here, love is not grounded in transparency or mutual respect.
The toxic partner sees themselves as superior and tries to dominate the other person.
Signs:
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Constant blaming and criticism
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Emotional manipulation (e.g., “If you love me, then...”)
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Difficulty expressing opinions
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Feelings of fear, tension, and anxiety
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Inability to feel self-worth
2. ROOT OF THE SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM
Self-esteem is the belief a person has in their abilities, value, and personality.
In toxic relationships, this belief is continuously undermined.
The partner’s persistent criticism, comparisons, and controlling behavior weaken one’s sense of self.
A person who has spent years trying to prove themselves can suddenly lose their identity.
Examples:
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“You can’t do anything right.”
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“I could’ve found someone better, but I stayed with you.”
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“Your opinion doesn’t matter — I know what’s best.”
When these phrases are repeated, a person’s inner confidence is veiled, and they start to feel weak and dependent.
3. WHY DO WE FALL INTO SUCH RELATIONSHIPS?
People often enter toxic relationships unconsciously. The reasons may include:
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Childhood trauma: Love and attention were given conditionally
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Domestic violence or pressure: Toxic behaviors were normalized early
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Low self-worth: “No one else will want me — at least I have this”
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Fear and dependence: Fear of being alone
These psychological roots cause individuals to choose familiar chains over freedom — because what is familiar often feels safer than the unknown.
4. EFFECTS – PHYSICAL AND PSYCHOLOGICAL CONSEQUENCES
The effects of toxic relationships are not only psychological — they manifest physically as well:
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Depression, panic attacks, social phobia
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Constant anxiety and insomnia
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Headaches, nausea, general fatigue
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Feeling guilty all the time
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Social withdrawal
Over time, such a relationship “erases” the individual’s personality, and they begin living as someone they no longer recognize.
5. WHY BREAKING FREE IS SO HARD
People often struggle to leave toxic relationships. Why?
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Psychological dependence: Emotional bonds that become habitual
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Mixed signals of love and abuse: The “hurts me but also loves me” paradox
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Fear: Fear of loneliness, judgment from family or society
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Hope: The illusion of “they will change”
These factors tighten the internal prison, creating someone who blames themselves, stays silent, and believes they must “endure.”
6. TOWARD FREEDOM – REDISCOVERING YOURSELF
Leaving a toxic relationship takes courage. But it’s the beginning of healing. At this stage:
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Know yourself: What do you want? What do you feel?
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Don’t fear silence: Learn to hear your inner voice
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Seek support: Therapist, trusted friend, books
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Take small steps: Make decisions alone, practice self-approval
Self-esteem can be rebuilt — gradually, but firmly.
7. HEAL YOURSELF – LOVE THE ONE IN THE MIRROR
Steps to recovery:
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Look at yourself in the mirror with love
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Trust your own voice
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Celebrate small victories every day
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Let go of the past
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Say “yes” to new beginnings
Remember: Your soul is valuable.
You don’t need to be crushed to be loved — you need to be free.
CONCLUSION: YOU DESERVE LOVE, RESPECT, AND FREEDOM
A toxic relationship is like a chain we live with for years — but that chain can be broken with a single decision.
It’s not easy, but it’s possible.
You are valuable.
You are not alone.
And you can be free.
SHEFEQ.COM — COMMENT AND QUESTION
And finally, a question just for you:
What door did you open for yourself today?
Will you keep silent, or start to listen to your voice?
At Shefeq.com, we support every step that brings you closer to your true voice.
Write, share, break free — you are worth it.